I think this is a very good paragraph! It has very interesting vocabulary! Maybe you could improve a bit on including your dad in the writing because at the end, you only said bye to your dad but I still think it’s really good!
WELL DONE!
Its very imaginative and realistic.
I liked the way you described the way felt.
It was engaging
What i think you can improve on is your title because in my opinion i think its silly but overall your writing is good
I had a picture in my head.
I liked the way that you turned one simple picture into a letter. Well done!
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I think this is a very good paragraph! It has very interesting vocabulary! Maybe you could improve a bit on including your dad in the writing because at the end, you only said bye to your dad but I still think it’s really good!
WELL DONE!
Its very imaginative and realistic.
I liked the way you described the way felt.
It was engaging
What i think you can improve on is your title because in my opinion i think its silly but overall your writing is good
I had a picture in my head.
I liked the way that you turned one simple picture into a letter. Well done!